If you are also a loner, may you be alone and free, walking alone and happy.
in life, some people always walk outside the crowd, which seems to build a wall for life.
but in fact, they are not deliberately estranged, just in the long river of life, found their own side of the world.
lace dress red formal is sure the best choice you will never regret. There are arrivals in the latest fashion trends.
66-year-old actor Chen Daoming is exactly like this.
recently, people have been surprised to find that Chen Daoming, who dubbed the popular TV series "the World", has not seen him for a long time.
the majestic voice, so that netizens have praised is worthy of the national treasure level of the old drama bone, the strength can not be underestimated.
some time ago, his minimalist lifestyle has also been a hot search, which has been hotly discussed by the whole network.
unlike other people's pursuit of fame and fortune, Chen Daoming always keeps his heart awake in his life.
it turns out that in recent years, he has gradually reduced his work arrangements, gradually avoided the troubles in the circle, and lived a life he longed for.
rather than expanding his network, he prefers to stay at home alone, reading, practicing calligraphy, painting, and sometimes doing handicrafts with his wife and squeezing candy for his daughter.
stay away from the crowd, away from the hustle and bustle, no longer trapped in interpersonal troubles, enjoy the quiet and good time.
talking about his views on life, Chen Daoming said: "when people are in chaos, everything is in chaos. The best way of life is to be lonely and not stick to fame and wealth. "
mediocre people fill the emptiness with excitement, and excellent people make themselves by being alone.
nowadays, there is also a kind of people who seem to be "loners": they don't like to gather together, get used to living alone, have few friends, are indifferent to feelings, don't expect to be understood, and rarely rely on others.
they seem to be at odds with the world, but in fact they are really strong.
be a loner,
is a kind of excellent at peace with the rest of the world
Zhou Guoping said:
"the bored are self-loathed, the lonely are self-pity, and the lonely are self-sufficient."
these are the three states of solitude and the three realms of life.
A really strong person does not panic when he is alone, is not blind in the crowd, and is calm enough to never be afraid of loneliness.
after Fudan Professor Chen Guo became popular on the Internet, he was attacked by abuse for a period of time.
gradually, some people accused her of giving lectures as "fast food culture", while others spread rumors that she was suspended from Fudan University.
since then, Chen Guoting has posted on Weibo and retired from public view, rarely appearing on social media.
never excuses for slander, but laughs off questions.
she put aside the complicated right and wrong and spent more time in class to enrich her soul.
some students ran into Professor Chen Guo at school. She wears headphones, won't be disturbed easily, quietly enjoys the serenity of loners, and doesn't care about gossip.
as she said:
"Let the noise be noisy. I do it on my own. I have all kinds of amorous feelings and I am at peace with the rest of the world."
more than a hundred years ago, a 28-year-old man, carrying a borrowed axe, moved alone to the uninhabited banks of Walden.
there, he cut firewood, built a cabin, and then ploughed and fed himself, and lived alone for two years and two months and two days.
when most people are eager to pursue fame and wealth, he chose to stay away from the hustle and bustle of the world, while enjoying the freedom of mind, while quietly writing, wrote the book Walden, which has influenced several generations.
the man who was regarded as a "maverick" at that time was the writer Thoreau.
in the eyes of others, his unsociable way of life is too lonely, and only he knows how happy it was to live alone.
being a loner is the firmness of having your own hills in your chest, not only independent but also free.
quitting the meaningless circle and no longer deliberately gregarious is a sign of a person's maturity.
"cool by nature",
is a kind of sobriety that sticks to the heart
Sanmao wrote in "A Horse for you":
"I avoid overheated friendships when nothing happens, which makes me less burdensome and less committed.
I don't talk too much about unnecessary gossip, which makes me feel clear.
I try not to remember the past as much as possible, because the way I came is impossible to turn back.
I love others carefully, because they are less likely to spread.
I don't ask for profundity, but for simplicity. "
this is probably the case with the so-called wakefulness in the world.
as I get older, I finally understand that people who are often called "cool by nature" often learn to subtract from life.
they never get entangled in human relations, do not please every relationship, and can keep every bottom line.
I was deeply impressed by a story I saw the other day:
A young graduate went to work on her first day, and her boss said to her:
"Don't waste your time socializing. Don't play with your colleagues. The most important thing is to work hard to improve yourself."
after hearing this, she disagreed, but still tried her best to have a good relationship with each of her colleagues.
someone was borrowing something in the office, but the others were silent, and she immediately handed over her papers;
someone shouted for takeout and asked her casually, and she immediately enthusiastically recommended the store to others.
after work, everyone went to dinner and invited her to join us, and she hurriedly joined the party.
but the reality is that later, everyone asked her to borrow something, but did not return it. Once she refused, she was accused of being heartless.
more and more people ask her to help order takeout, but no one gives her money for meals. When she asks for it, she is accused of being stingy.
before the dinner was over, everyone found an excuse to break up and let her stay and pay the bill.
after that, she became indifferent, no longer gregarious, refused those unreasonable requests, and invested her energy and time in improving her ability.
when people reach middle age, their circles are getting smaller and smaller, their friends are getting fewer and fewer, they are becoming more and more decisive in dealing with the world, and they are getting cooler and thinner in the face of interpersonal relationships.
this is not only the indifference after years of polishing, but also the sobriety after seeing people coming and going.
I quite agree with Cai Kangyong's view:
"I don't think it's too warm, it's the best way to maintain a good relationship with others, and it's harder to be tied up by the word" warm ".
I advise you to be a cold person and learn to be indifferent so that you can be completely warm
everything happens on its own,
is a powerful way to see reality clearly
there is a profound question in "Ferry Man": "if fate is a lonely river, who will be the ferry man of your soul?"
the answer has only two words: yourself.
your parents can't stay with you all your life, your partner won't stand by you all the time, and it's normal for friends to gather and break up.
Life is full of mud and sand, no matter how heavy the wind and rain is, it is safest to carry it with your own umbrella.
I can't help thinking of the story of Liu Yuanyuan, the annual champion of Super orator. She came from a poor family, and her parents saved money for her to go to school by farming.
before she went to high school, her academic performance was not good, and she was laughed at by her classmates because she spoke with an accent.
in her freshman year of high school, she suddenly realized that she could not just accept a mediocre life, so she set a goal in her diary:
take part in Peking University at 17, TOEFL in freshman year, go abroad in sophomore year, start a business at 25 years old, make your own business bigger.
with hard work and firm will, she achieved her goal little by little, entered Peking University, set up her own company, and was listed on the Forbes China under-30 Elite list at the age of 28.
when she took part in Super orator, she got through all the way to the position of champion when her mentors didn't like it.
that inspiring speech really moved everyone.
like what she said in her speech:
"most of us are not from wealthy families. We are all on our own. Fate gives you a lower starting point than others. It is to tell you that it will take you a lifetime to fight back a Jedi story."
there is a period of isolation and helplessness in everyone's life, and only by self-passage can we resist all difficulties.
as the saying goes: relying on mountains will fall, water will wither, temples will collapse, gods will run, it is better to ask for others than to rely on yourself.
people who rely on themselves give up dependence, lower expectations, see reality clearly, and become their own eaves.
half of life, no matter how hard it is to carry it, one person can be a man with thousands of troops.
to be your own sun, you don't need to rely on whose light, this is the real strong.
people live all their lives,
what is the best way to live?
the writer Milan Kundera wrote a sentence:
"from now on, I begin to choose my life carefully. I am no longer easily lost in all kinds of temptations, and I no longer need to look back and care about the rights and wrongs and arguments behind me.
I have no time to think about the past. I want to move on.
when you reach a certain age, you don't have to play tricks and wrongs yourself any more. You have to understand that if you don't have many friends, you should be sincere.
half of your life goes by in a hurry, you don't have to care too much about other people's eyes, you know, it's best to live happily.
the best way to live is to have a relationship with fate, to take matters into your own hands, to do whatever you want, and to enjoy loneliness.
, if you are also a loner, may you be alone and free, walking alone and happy.