I want to forget you generously.
"I still have a picture of you. I can pay you back when it is convenient for you. " Three years after the breakup, he suddenly came to me.
the photo he said was the childhood photo we exchanged when we were together. I secretly took it from the photo album at home.
receiving that Wechat message was a very hot day during the summer vacation.
I don't know whether it is because of the high temperature or because of his sudden greeting, I am inexplicably angry and irritable.
I threw my phone aside and said to myself at the other end of the screen, "We'll never see each other again. How are you going to return it?"
sitting in front of the fan, I thought of many kinds of responses, and finally I tapped on my phone: "just throw it away."
but after this sentence came out, I suddenly felt stupid--
if that picture could really be thrown away by him, it seemed that the sincerity of being together could also be thrown away.
then hastened to add: "if you must return it, give it to F (our mutual friend). I see more opportunities for him."
I know that three years later, he suddenly chose to return the photo to me because of the beautiful smiling girl holding hands who appeared in the moments yesterday.
after you have new feelings, it will always be a nuisance to keep people or things from the past.
is quite funny.
this precious picture of him at that time has become a "superfluity" in his life three years later.
people are always easy to think of small things and then think of a lot of things that have been "forgotten".
when I was with him at that time, 200 text messages would burst, and new messages received would not be displayed.
I didn't want to delete those messages, so I copied down every one of them, even if it was just a simple good night.
when everyone else is taking a nap, I secretly lie on my desk while looking at the small mobile phone screen, copying and laughing.
buy another book if you can't copy it enough. These serious and childish manuscripts have become souvenirs of those days in a sense.
it's just that no matter how hard and serious I copied at that time, after receiving that breakup sentence one night, I threw them all away with a straight face.
there was an episode in the days when I copied text messages.
one day, the text message he copied out unwillingly was accidentally discovered by his father, and he read several shame messages of young people without saying a word.
during a very tangled period of time after the breakup, my father would keep talking about these things and making fun of me. And every time I unconsciously think of that person, embarrassed and sad at the same time.
if we had dealt with the things that should be "forgotten" in the first place, we would not have given that person the chance to appear in life again and again.
to my surprise, the man really went too far to ask F to give the picture back to me.
F Wechat asked me, "when will you take that picture back?"
I thought about it on the other end of the phone and said, "I'll give it to you." If you don't like it, just throw it away. "
I don't know why. I was a little angry at that time. Maybe I was angry that he didn't cherish the picture at all, or maybe I was angry that I didn't dare to take it back.
F could not laugh or cry and said, "I thought it was important, but suddenly I thought it was superfluous."
this sentence stunned me, and then said, "help me throw it away." I don't want it. " F didn't reply to me this time.
and I finally figured out why I was angry.
that photo is a witness to our being together, so it is really "superfluous" for his new life.
but to me, isn't that picture "superfluous"?
Why do you want me to help you dispose of your "garbage" after breaking up?
Star bohemian wedding gowns with sleeves inexpensive Our collection has now made it super cool to get your choice.
Why do you have to give me a "relic" after breaking up to remind me of you again and again?
I finally calmed down the storm you gave me. Why do you remind me of so many things so easily?
I remember that for a long time after my separation, I was full of fear for many little things in my life. For example, when my cell phone rings, I'm afraid it's his text message; for example, when I'm drinking in a coffee shop, I'm afraid to see his favorite drink.
did you know that for some people, it takes every effort to just forget something about the past.
at this time, there are always some people trying to bring up the past for the sake of their new life.
but please, I really can't face those days so honestly, and I really can't smile at your new life.
the only thing I want to do and can do is delete everything about you and pretend I'm doing well, pretending I don't care at all.
as for those gifts and relics of the past, I don't want them.
just like our relationship, just throw it away and stop saying give it back to me.
how do you return it?
can't pay it back, they're all dead.
neither. Good night.