What is more important than the bride price is each other's sincerity and attitude.
A few days ago, bilibili's UP host, named "Jiupin Sesame shoveling shit official", released a video, which sparked a heated discussion.
in the surveillance video, the girl was forcibly dragged out of the house and beaten by her parents in her pajamas. She cried for help, but no amount of struggle could help.
the boy tried to rush out to save his girlfriend, but he was knocked to the ground and dragged back into the house, unable to fight back.
the reason why this video is so hot and has a lot of topics is because of its title:
"if there is no 50W bride price and my girlfriend is forcibly dragged away, what should I do?"
the boy said that he and his girlfriend had been together for six years and had already bought a house and wrote down his girlfriend's name, but the woman's parents were ungrateful and still held strong opposition, saying that they had to break up if they could not come up with a 500000 bride price.
, it was even rumored on the Internet that the woman revealed that she had a younger brother at home. The 500000 bride price was to buy a wedding house for her younger brother.
things are getting more and more intense, and public opinion on the Internet is constantly fermenting, so the woman has to come forward and respond:
the conditions of the family do not need to use betrothal gifts to buy a wedding house for their younger brother, and the parents will support themselves to graduate school, and there is no preference for sons over daughters.
500000 bride price is just a personal problem for my parents to be angry with me. They want me to have a stable job instead of working in the self-media industry with my boyfriend.
as for the content in the video, the girl also explained that she did not tell her parents so as not to make her parents more angry. She repeatedly said that she was not under control of her freedom in life.
but this remark did not convince the public, but made netizens feel that she was trying to cover it up.
some people say: typical people are afraid that public opinion is too big, it is difficult for their son to find a partner, and he has become famous in three villages and five li.
some people also analyze that the reason why girls do this is to save their parents. After all, you will go to prison to interfere with other people's freedom of marriage by violence.
to date, no specific investigation results have been released, and the truth is complicated and confusing.
and netizens lamented this incident because of the long-standing and controversial topic of "bride price".
is it true that the bride price is called a "stumbling block" on the way of marriage?
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two years ago, the news of "Brother, my family is rich" made many people break through their defenses and put the bride price issue at the forefront of the storm.
A landlord of Tieba saved 100, 000 yuan alone for many years, and his parents handed over only 400000 of his savings to him to prepare for his marriage.
but did not expect that the landlord's girlfriend's family asked for 500000 bride price. Once all the money is handed over, he will be penniless, not to mention the purchase of the wedding, and where the cost of living after marriage comes from.
500000 betrothal gifts are impartial, is it possible that the woman's family has already had a "premeditation"?
then the landlord said frankly that there is no other way to get married, that is to sell his parents' house.
but his parents are just ordinary workers, and there is a sister who is about to enter college to support. Without a house and savings, the family can only live a life of vagrancy.
abandon your family in order to get married? The whole family helps the poor?
this makes many netizens indignant, angry at their unfilial piety and sad for their misfortune.
Family and marriage always have to make a choice, and the landlord himself is trapped in it, struggling very much.
how can he not hesitate to maintain his once happy and insipid family and seize the eight-year love of Tongji through wind and rain?
just before he thinks about it, his parents have made a decision for him.
my sister suddenly sent a message: brother, our family is rich; the house has been sold.
the matter has come to this, the landlord is restless, can only have a showdown with his girlfriend, and repeatedly begged her to reduce the bride price to 100000.
but everyone is well aware of the attitude of the woman's parents. There is only one precious daughter in the family. 500000 is the money to "sell" her daughter, and there is no room for negotiation.
after several twists and turns, the landlord was physically and mentally exhausted and could not find a complete solution, so he had to be relieved with his girlfriend: not to get married.
he did not become an unfilial "animal" in the words of netizens, and he almost lost his love.
the sentence "the poor are not qualified to marry" by the landlord made countless people sympathize with each other and scoffed at the bride price.
but unexpectedly, it's all fictional.
I do not know what kind of mentality to compile such a story to win sympathy.
but in recent years, it has been common for couples to part ways because of betrothal gifts.
No one hates the sky-high bride price, and no matter how strong the love is, it is fragile.
there is a message on Zhihu about "do boys really cannot accept betrothal gifts?"
"posts remains high.
A freshman's answer triggered an "earth-shaking" debate of words, with more than 120000 comments.
some people argue with reason, some curse, some agree, different voices ferment in the comment area, and "maturity", "reality", "responsibility" and "birth risk" are the highest words.
Why is there such a sharp hostility?
because many people cannot see the full picture of the bride price, but they are afraid of the impact behind it, they can only argue on matters that have nothing to do with them.
fall in love for several years and finally come to a dead end in the betrothal gift, which is unacceptable to many people.After all, betrothal gifts are not part of love.
some people say: marriage is not the grave of love, betrothal gifts are.
but there are also people who think that betrothal gifts are just a way to express sincerity in feelings.
it is understandable that men do not want a marriage full of interests, and women do not want a married life without security.
instead of beating to death with a stick, it is better to talk about the original intention of betrothal gifts in essence.
the sky-high bride price, "selling" the daughter and "helping the brother" all misinterpret the original meaning of the bride price.
proper betrothal gifts actually solve the marital dilemma of most grass-roots women.
Women tend to bear more pressure and responsibility after getting married and having children. In recent years, "widowed parenting or marriage" has become an unspeakable pain for most women.
the situation of raising children while working makes women often in a weak position in marriage. If there is an emotional crisis at this time, the situation of women will be more passive.
A friend and her boyfriend had been in love for five years and had to get married early because they were pregnant.
because the boys are in the entrepreneurial stage and the economy is tight, the bride price is avoided.
less than two years later, my husband had an affair and there was no possibility for them to continue, so their friends had no choice but to divorce.
but all her previous financial, labor and childbearing efforts have come to naught.
there is no betrothal gift to bear the risk for her.
because full-time housewives earn much less than men, they suffer injustice in their marriage and it is almost impossible for them to get paid.
so how do you have the ability to resist this risk? How do you dare to raise objections when a marriage is breaking up?
the answer is obvious: bride price.
every newly married couple wants to spend their lives together, support a family and shoulder their own responsibilities.
most women regard betrothal gifts as the attitude of men to love her, as a guarantee of the marriage, rather than as a means to support the woman's family.
betrothal gifts exist to protect the worst, but also to add icing on the cake, and should not be a stumbling block to marriage.
my colleague gave a betrothal gift of 60, 000 yuan when they got married, but when the couple decorated their new house, the woman gave another 100000 yuan.
it seems that the man gave the bride price, but in the end the money ended up in their small family.
only when both men and women clearly understand the meaning of bride price, can the problem be solved in essence.
if you can't share, look for ways to balance each other.
it is not necessary to raise the betrothal gift, nor to regard it as a scourge.
it is only for the sake of others that both parties can understand that what is more important than the bride price is each other's sincerity and attitude.
emotion is a matter for two people. If we are not in the same boat, we cannot come to the end. Only when we share the same mind, can the road of life go smoothly.