Lower yourself, empty yourself, let go of yourself.

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there was a shipper, carrying a heavy burden, crossing the river on a bamboo raft.

the duke asked him why he didn't put down his burden, and the shipper said he was afraid the raft would sink.

Duke Li shook his head and said, "it's more dangerous for you to pick like this, but it's more stable to put it down."

the word "release" means to take a raft, and it is also life.

the more you grow up, the more you will find that the real practice of life lies in knowing how to place yourself properly.

lower yourself

"Yanzi Spring and Autumn" records a story.

Yanzi, prime minister of Qi, had a special rickshaw driver to drive for him.

once, the coachman's wife peeked through the door and saw her husband strutting and whipping four horses, very proud.

when the coachman got home, his wife wanted to abandon him.

when her husband asked her why, the wife said:

"Yanzi is less than six feet tall and famous as prime minister, but he speaks and behaves in a polite manner. While you are eight feet tall and work as a rickshaw driver, you are arrogant. "

in life, we are sometimes like rickshaw pullers:

because I have a bit of a family background, I think I am superior to others, and my words are full of domineering arrogance.

with a little bit of talent, he is defiant and shows a tiresome sense of superiority.

in the Chronicles of the three Kingdoms, Zhou Yu was highly praised by Sun Quan as "the capital of Wang Zuo". Even on her deathbed, Sun Quan asked Sun Quan to serve Zhou Yu with her brother's gift.

in theory, the success of a teenager is somewhat frivolous, but Zhou Yu is gentle and modest to all his officers and soldiers and is never proud of his position.

so much so that Cheng Pu, an old minister of the three dynasties, was also convinced of Zhou Yu and said with emotion, "having sex with Zhou Gongjin is like drinking alcohol and mash, and you don't feel drunk."

George Bernard Shaw said:

"No matter how much one has achieved, one cannot boast." Everyone should be treated equally and always be modest. "

Water eventually returns to the sea because of goodness, and mountains do not contend for height to form their own peaks.

the lower-level people are more likely to be in the limelight, and the higher-level people are, the more restrained they are.

in the program "Welcome to Lao Liang", Liang Hongda said of Ge You, "if you have come into contact with him, you will like him 100%."

at the wine table, a group of people talked about drinking, while others talked about and touted themselves.

some people show seniority, think they are a little talented, and always like to give advice.

some people brag about experience and show off the little things about rotten millet with old sesame seeds.

but Ge You never, whenever anyone is willing to say, he always listens patiently and nods at the same time: "I really don't know. I have to listen to you explain it in detail."

A mature person knows how to resist the impulse to show off and put aside his mind to show off.

when you interact with others, they will not think highly of you because of your temporary publicity, but they will appreciate your reserved and introverted character.

empty yourself

psychologists have done an experiment.

they asked 10 volunteers to sit in a room without mirrors, and then asked a special effects makeup artist to put on realistic scar makeup for them.

after the makeup is done, psychologists use small mirrors that they carry with them to ask volunteers to observe the scars on their faces.

then the psychologist took away the mirror and told them to apply some more powder later in order to make the scar more real.

after a while, the psychologist came in with the makeup artist, but instead of applying powder, they secretly wiped off the false scars and "blood" with wet cotton cloth.

when everything is ready, psychologists ask volunteers to dress up as patients with facial scars, queue up in the waiting rooms of major hospitals, and observe the reactions of people around them.

at the end of the experiment, psychologists asked volunteers to state their feelings, and they said:

"the fat woman in the waiting room looked at me with disdain as soon as she entered the door."

"there was a middle-aged man sitting on the sofa. When he saw me passing, he dodged me like a plague."

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"there are two strange girls who seem to be knowledgeable and cultured, but they have been mocking me in private."

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but everyone was taken aback when psychologists told them the truth.

it turns out that what affects their mood is not the scars on their faces, but their wishful thinking.

A lot of people have similar experiences:

A casual remark from a friend will speculate to himself for a long time and make up a big play after thinking about it.

was pointed out to be wrong at work, he suspected that the leader was dissatisfied with himself and had a worried day.

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when you encounter a little thing, there will be dark clouds in your heart.

A brief History of Man says: "all pain does not come from bad luck, social injustice or the willfulness of the gods, but depends on the mode of thought in everyone's mind."

when you take everything to heart, you can't let it go, you will get caught up in serious internal friction.

know how to put an end to things and sweep away your troubles in order to be at ease.

as Nietzsche said in "Human, too Human": "there is no need to be sensitive all the time, dullness is sometimes a virtue."

Don't stir up waves in your heart because of the slightest stir; don't let other people's words and deeds influence your own life.

when the heart is simple, happiness will be simple.

know how to empty yourself, and the joys in life will heal you like the sun.

Let it goOneself

read a story about Picasso.

Picasso rose to fame after painting masterpieces such as the Girl of Avignon and Guernica, and many painters imitated one after another, resulting in a flood of fake paintings.

others feel angry for him, but Picasso doesn't care and never takes responsibility. When he sees someone falsifying his painting, he only blots out the forged signature at most.

he comforted himself by saying, "Why should I make a mountain out of a molehill?"

in Picasso's opinion:

first, the counterfeiters are either poor painters or old friends, so why make it difficult for them?

second, those experts who identify authentic works also have to eat, and I have nothing to lose.

Picasso knows very well that it is his mood that is ruined by blindly competing.

cartoonist Jimmy once said:

"Don't dwell on something awkward for too long. Entangled for a long time, you will be annoyed, painful, epiglottic, tired, hurt, and heartbroken. In fact, in the end, you don't have a problem with things, but with yourself. "

people live in the world, the deeper they get entangled, the more they lose.

the writer Ping Kaishun once talked about his father's stroke.

once at the gate of the community, a car occupied the crosswalk, making it inconvenient for pedestrians to pass by.

when the Don saw a young man sitting in the car, he went over to persuade him to take the car away.

as a result, there was a lot of truth, but the young man remained indifferent, and finally became angry and yelled at the Don:

"I'm in your way here. If you're all right, get out of the way."

Don was so upset that he held his breath all the time and had a stroke two days later.

later, Ping Kaishun lamented that the biggest mistake his father made was trying to influence an unreasonable person with reason.

keep an eye on some people and things, and you end up torturing yourself.

Life should have uncompetitive wisdom and learn to laugh off bad people and bad things.

A lifetime, such as the morning dew, living a good life is more important than anything else.

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Thoreau wrote in Walden: "the more things a man can let go, the richer he is."

if you understand the word "release", you will understand the philosophy of life.

lowering is a pattern, emptying is wisdom, letting go is a realm, and only by getting rid of the disturbances of the outside world can we build inner stability and calm.

, share with your friends.

Insight ciyu, Insight

columnist.