What I want to say to you is in those withdrawals.
A Tong was scolded in the group for his mistakes at work.
I guessed that she was upset, so after 12:00 at night, I secretly talked about her: "the other party speaks more bluntly, don't take it to heart." It won't have much impact this time, so don't be sad. "
maybe she was in the shower, but she waited until more than one o'clock to reply to me, but the message was a little sudden: "compared to this, can you teach me that my parents quarreled and divorced, and my senior brother wanted to quit school? what should I do?"
I was stupefied in front of the screen for more than ten seconds. Before I could figure out how to reply, she suddenly withdrew this sentence and replaced it with another sentence: "I'm all right, don't take it to heart, good night."
is followed by a cute expression.
she probably thought I was asleep and didn't see it.
I looked at the remark that was somewhat against my will, and after the gray "the other party has withdrawn a message", I thought about it, turned off the phone screen and pretended not to see it.
because I know that everyone has an impulsive moment and wants to talk about their accumulated uneasiness for a long time. And I also know that now we all know that we have to learn to put up with these uneasiness secretly.
I suddenly remembered a girl I liked at that time.
she likes playing the game of "withdraw" very much.
when I go to take a shower or fall asleep, she sends me several messages and then withdraws them decisively.
and no matter how I asked her afterwards, she would say mischievously, "the withdrawn news cannot be said again."
I had no choice but to shake my head and keep complaining about Wechat's withdrawal function, because I really want to know what she said. So late one night I pretended to be asleep and stared at my phone.
send a message in front of the screen: "are you a pig? you go to bed earlier than me every day, and you don't chat with me every day." This sentence has been on the screen for less than ten seconds, but it has made me happy for a long time.
but this naughty and warm withdrawal of the game only lasted more than two months, and one day she suddenly posted a message on Wechat saying: "I am single."
without any mental preparation, I stood in front of the screen.
I don't know if it's because of a short circuit in my head or I hope she can withdraw it again. After more than ten seconds of silence, I replied, "well, congratulations."
I dropped my phone on the bed, rubbed my face, and sat on one side with an expressionless face.
people's emotions can easily explode in the middle of the night when they can't sleep.
at more than two o'clock that night, I suddenly bounced out of bed and edited a long message to her.
I said a lot of serious silly things such as "I'm sorry, I like her very much, I don't want her to be with anyone else". More than ten seconds after I sent it out, I suddenly panicked.
those ten seconds became very long, and I kept thinking-- is it really appropriate for me to say that she is asleep and how she will reply?
in less than a minute, I took a long breath and pressed withdraw.
Yes, those are the things I really want to say to her.
but after all the emotion, I soon realized that I shouldn't have said this after others got out of order, and it wouldn't have any effect.
after the withdrawal, I still couldn't help struggling in bed, afraid that she would see it, that she didn't see it, and that she pretended not to see it.
but no matter how tangled it is, I won't foolishly say it again.
after all, only children feel that all the truth should be spoken.
later, she also came to ask me what I withdrew last night.
I smiled helplessly at the other end of the screen and learned from her: "you can't say the withdrawn news again."
at that moment I was a little lost and grateful: she really didn't see those words.
now think about it. When A Tong said those words at that time, he must have been like me for more than ten seconds, hoping to get a response.
it's just that she, like me, quickly gave up the idea and chose to withdraw.
because we are all afraid that if we "cross the line", some "out of line" emotions will become pressure on each other, because slowly we will all form a habit of secretly soothing our own emotions.
being withdrawn is the most appropriate destination for that emotion. And "don't see" is the best response.
there is a poorly used saying, "you are going to be a quiet adult." Don't be emotional, don't miss secretly, don't look back. To live another life. You have to be obedient. Not all fish live in the same sea. "
this sentence moves countless people precisely because we all know that even if we become adults, we will still be emotional, still secretly miss, and still look back.
it's just that compared with children, we know how to smooth these marks in various ways.
such as withdrawing truth,
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such as deleted moments,
such as "I'm all right" when I feel bad,
like every night, I will say, good night.